Not too much experience with car gearboxes either Adrian but since it stays in mesh [mash? ;-) ] under load then I would think that the dogs are not unduly worn. Perhaps a worn selector fork would prevent it from fully engaging but then would it not pop out under load as well? My guess is a worn engine mount allowing the engine/transmission unit to move when accelerating or braking so that it pops out of 2nd under light load but the undercut on the dogs keeps it engaged under heavier loads.
Derek
Derek